How do you do discipline your child? Several volunteered answers: With yantok (rod) or belt.
Batok (a slap on the nape).
Kutos (a knuckle blow on the head).
Kurot sa singit (a pinch near the groin area) or pingot (ear-pinching).
"Luhod sa munggo! (kneel on mongo beans)!"
Our bible study group members seemed not to run out of recollections about how parents and teachers punished unruly kids during our time.
C recalled being placed inside a jute sack, which was then tied and hoisted to a beam so she could not jump out until the punishment was over.
We've, in recent weeks, been immersing ourselves on the lessons of Proverbs, mostly written by King Solomon; pleasantly realizing that his words, though written in 931 BC (approximately 3,000 years ago), still offer wisdom for practical application in our time.
One of these verses: Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death. (Proverbs 23:13)
"We were always made to squat," Jack, our bible study teacher, said of his school superiors' style of discipline whenever they came too late for classes during his elementary grades.
"Then we got the knuckle treatment when caught in misdemeanor. That was really painful."
Of course, today, parents and teachers are more careful. Some countries, like the US and Australia, have severe laws protecting children's rights, mainly as a response to numerous cases of child abuse where the state must step in as an advocate for children who suffer harm from irresponsible adults. So a child can call 911 to ask for help.
This issue has sadly turned sour because parents now refrain from using the rod, nor any tool of discipline at all, for fear that their children will report them to the authorities.
But we must discipline and let our children know for sure if they have transgressed or gone out of bounds---for their own sake! Disciplining helps develop well balanced, stable individuals with a healthy worldview: That goodness reaps rewards while pooh-poohing what's right merits disapproval.
Hebrews 12:6: For the LORD disciplines those He loves, and He punishes each one He accepts as his child.
Following His example, we must also discipline our children, because we love them. No parent wants to punish a child. İ'm sure your heart breaks every time you need to confront your son or daughter because he or she has done something awful.
But our heart agonizes even more if our children traverse the "do not enter" route, say they become barkada (part of the peer group) with those who do drugs or drink or bully others. Because if they persist in that, potholes and landmines may not be far behind.
So as loving parents, we step in with a very clear rebuke---to make sure they don't repeat the wrong.
We young once are learning from young ones. Today's parents have reinvented the rod so they can discipline their kids without breaking the law of the state.
"Go to your spot!" İ've observed how a young boy---seemingly shamed and humbled---pleadingly cried, "İ'm sorry, İ will not do it again!" after his mother ordered him to face the wall and not sit or move out of that position for a long time (after he whacked a playmate).
And this parent never hesitates to apply the face-the-wall punishment to her two kids, who it seems are growing more and more to be God-fearing and parent-honoring, considerate and kind to others.
İn school, to have a student write, "İ will never copy from my seatmate again," 100 times, may reform a cheat.
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. (Poverbs 22:6 )
Parenthood is awesome responsibility. Love. Care for. Motivate. Encourage. Teach. Train. Provide. Feed. Clothe. Educate. We owe our children these, having brought them out into this world.
But the parenting package is not complete without the painful task of rebuking, disciplining or correcting. However, we need to do it while our kids are young, nipping bad attitudes and practices in the bud, even before they get entrenched and become lifetime habits that eventually lead them not to lala-land but to lose-lose-land.
Some kids, in spite of their parents' careful training, have gone the forbidden way anyway. But His Word says, "when they are old, they will not depart from it."
İn the middle of their disobedience, what you taught them when they were but toddlers or tweens will come back, just like a wave returning to shore even if it proudly surges out.
Because you've planted it in their soul. The seed may take time to bud, but eventually it will, and you'll be surprised at the result. Any learning is useful even if it takes the longer route.
That's His promise if you are a good steward of your children. That's why He commands, "Train!" If we obey, He takes care of the rest. With Jesus, nothing is impossible!
Better to have disciplined than not disciplined at all.
Image credits: yeetle.blogspot.com, squidoo.com, thammiesy.com, metu.edu.tr
"Why did you do that?" my dad would ask and then quietly wait for the answer even if it took an hour. His one-question inquisition worked all the time.
ReplyDeleteOh, that is more intense. I forgot to include the first time Tatay used the belt. That was the first and the last! Nagtanda!
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