Expletives or Love

"I love you!"

I hardly heard those words when I was growing up. I happen to have been born to a family where affection was hardly expressed in words.

"I love you!" just hovered about like a hot air balloon. But you just felt it even after all the quarreling and much assertion of who's got greater authority.

I distinctly remember my sister Dulce patiently delousing my hair when I was five years old---even inside the church as mass went on; or Kuya Tony cooking our favorite ginulay na saging which was and still is some sort of comfort food for all of us.

And how could anyone miss Nanay and Tatay's strivings to send all of us eight children to school?

But now that I'm a grandmother and my siblings have become grandparents too, we've more and more become accustomed to saying "I love you!" While we were still a bit stingy with it with our spouses and our own kids, we say it more generously today.

With our kids and grandchildren, and even siblings, living in different parts of the globe, "I love you!" seems to be the best expression of affection for our terribly-missed loved ones---whenever there's an opportunity to say it.

"I think love is overrated," Dale, my former student, wrote on Facebook.

I commented, "It's not love that's overrated. People have cheapened the concept of love, substituting it for physical attraction; but real love which is Agape love is pure and it comes from God."

Jesus demonstrated Agape love---this love which enabled Him to endure the cross so that those who would put their trust in Him might be saved and enjoy abundant life.

Many of us have been to that place where Agape love didn't exist---those moments when everything that mattered was "I," "me," and "myself."

Without the love of God, we simply could not love. Unless we have Jesus, our sinful nature will rear its ugly head through selfishness and pride. Jesus alone can change our hard hearts so that we can love without conditions.

Jennifer Lopez says "I love you!" a lot to American Idol contestants. TV stars shout it out to their audiences. Well, that's not the love we're talking about. However, I'd rather have someone's "I love you!" any time, even if it had been matter-of-factly uttered.

Her co-host Steven Tyler on the other hand fires out quite a number of bleep-able expletives. Wouldn't you rather hear "I love you!" than expletives or cursing?

Like, how can anyone use the name of Jesus to swear or take offense or wish someone evil? Remember your catechism class? That's number four of the commandments God passed on to Moses: "You shall not take the name of the Lord in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes the name of the Lord in vain." (Exodus 20:1-17)

"Jesus Christ!" Diyos ko (Oh my God)!" "Susmaryosep (Jesus, Mary and Joseph)!" In stead of these, you may just opt for "Oops!" or "I love you!" even if you're grating your teeth or clenching your fist at an offense or another's fumble.

"I love you!" will probably help put things in perspective. No one's loveable enough but by the grace of God. So mean it and it will calm the raging beast inside if you've really been peeved.

Pure love doesn't take offense. It doesn't ask for anything in return. It is unconditional. Take it from Jesus. Having forsaken Himself and demonstrated His love for us, He now sits with the Father, interceding on our behalf---that the love of many which has grown cold, may be rekindled.

And if If you've cursed or rattled off expletives because you couldn't hold your tongue, take heart; come to Him in humility, repent and He will cleanse you of all unwholesome talk.

He is faithful to forgive.